Single Parenting

On day 1 they fell in love
I say they but now it feels it was just her
By day 2 they had so much connection it felt so real so good to be true
She fell hard she fell crazy for him
By day hundredth she borne her baby girl
This part she always imagined differently hoping she already had the ring on her finger
There was no ring which didn't bother much
But he wasn't there too..

Her head has always had a blurry image of him
Standing far away.. so far she couldn't see his face, far enough she couldn't tell if it was actually him or it's just her illusion of him.
Days passed on..clock ticked by a man came in and went out of her life..
This man she thought he was but he was always a little boy.
The treasure the precious treasure she thought she and her little girl were to him now feels like they were just his toy

21 years of living but she nurtured her actual life for 9 months
Many many days of wandering around behind him
but today is different, today a little finger holds her hand spinning around with her behind him
She walked everyday being in a maze of darkness that she may find him
Saying no to his wishes never made her happy as she wished maybe something or other might make him like her a little more..

When she looked into his eyes she swears she found a good soul inside
Everyone might have said no but she was too adamant to deny it
She always believed she could mould him into the better one he always wanted to be
She always believed anything is possible if trying harder is the key.

She decided to give it her heart and soul
She decided to allow his right over her girl
She decided to move places.. even if it meant everyday she picked his shoes and sock
She decided to give in everything to make it work.
Her heart said nothing could be a better place for her girl to grow in than in his family..
She made her leave her family to be part of his

Mother is a word not accomplished by the labor and delivery
mother is not a word it is a duty they fulfilled
For her girl she carried the badge of a mother but her peii calmed octavia every night she was away
Her ratu fed Octavia bottle and waited for her to fall asleep every night after an overtime at work
Her maa her maa nurtured her girl everyday after she borne her..
Her tasa went till year 10 and was 19 when he bought his niece a pair of shoe that wont fit as her papa walked around with maa trying not to envy the love Octavia got..

Her girl has all the love of this world but somewhere she convinced herself that he might give her more..
She convinced herself that what Octavia had was not enough if he wasnt around
Somewhere in her heart she knew she wanted it to happen for her too..
Call it greed call it stupidity
For her it felt right it felt good and it felt fair and square..

She offered him chances and chances
She fell way below her self respect to uplift him
She got bruised and as her heart bled he said sorry
She believed her girl would change his heart and he would fall in love with them just as she fell in love with him
Until she started walking
She walked and she walked holding her 6 month old in her arms tight protectively
She walked few miles on road but she has walked a lot further from him
Now when she looks and he is still there far away where he was before where she couldn't recognize if it was really him..
Then she realizes he had never moved towards her
She always walked back and forth making herself convinced he was the one getting closer but he was just at one place, stationary.

A year back and 10 years from now she could have done the same over and over again just so he felt closer
But today she sees a little finger entangled with hers.. a little finger which she cannot let go
She always thought her world was him but today he was nothing..
Today as her baby hugs her thinking she is the last thing in her world
She hugs her baby back knowing that her baby and only her baby is her whole world..